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Lightning Fill In The Blank

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now onto our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players has 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS: I sure can, and it's quite a spread. Helen has two, Luke has three and Adam has four.

SAGAL: Oh, my gosh. Well then, we know who's going first, and that would be Helen. You're in third place. You're up first. The clock will start when I begin your first question. Fill in the blank. This week, ISIS claimed that the man who attacked students at blank was one of their soldiers.

HELEN HONG: Ohio State

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Sunday, the Syrian government captured key parts of the rebel-held city of blank.

HONG: Aleppo.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, evacuations continued as the blanks in Tennessee spread.

HONG: Wildfires.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Thursday, Howard Schultz announced he would step down as the CEO of blank in 2017.

HONG: "Peanuts."

SAGAL: No, Starbucks.

(LAUGHTER)

ADAM FELBER: Different Schultz.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Yeah, took me a second.

FELBER: Awesome.

SAGAL: Took me a second.

HONG: Laugh it up, guys. Laugh it up.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: For the second season in a row, Michigan's blank was named the Big Ten's tight end of the year.

HONG: Sports. Yep.

(LAUGHTER)

HONG: I got nothing.

SAGAL: Jake Butt.

(LAUGHTER)

HONG: No way.

SAGAL: Yes.

HONG: His name is Jake Butt?

FELBER: How could you not vote for him for tight end?

HONG: And he's tight end of the year? Come on.

SAGAL: Twice in a row.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: This week, researchers reported that thanks to poaching, African elephants are now being born without blanks.

HONG: Tusks.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Right. Due to increased online shopping, stores reported that this year's blank sales were down from last year.

HONG: Black Friday.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Police in Australia suspected a woman might be driving drunk...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...when they spotted her blanking.

HONG: Drinking a beer?

SAGAL: No, driving with an entire children's swing set stuck to her car.

(LAUGHTER)

HONG: That was going to be my next answer.

FELBER: Circumstantial evidence.

SAGAL: Several concerned neighbors called the police. They said there's this woman. She just swerved off the road into a backyard and then out again with a swing set on the roof of her SUV.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Officers pulled her over. The woman blew four times over the legal limit and also failed Australia's standard road sobriety test, which is simply not driving around with a swing set...

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: ...On the roof of your car. Bill, how did Helen do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Helen had five right - 10 more points, total of 12. She's in the lead.

SAGAL: All right.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: So Luke, you're up next. Fill in the blank. In a tweet sent out this week, Donald Trump suggested making blank illegal.

LUKE BURBANK: Flag burning.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, the Colombian Congress approved a new peace deal with the blank rebels.

BURBANK: Farc.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Amid growing accusations of corruption, Park Geun-hye, the president of blank, offered to resign on Tuesday.

BURBANK: South Korea

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: During his annual State of the Nation address in Moscow, blank said he was ready to work with the Trump administration.

BURBANK: Putin.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Police in Canada are threatening drunk drivers with blank if they're caught.

BURBANK: Listening to Justin Trudeau's band.

SAGAL: So close.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Listening to Nickelback.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, Jim Delligatti, the inventor of the blank, passed away at the age of 98.

BURBANK: The Big Mac.

SAGAL: Indeed.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: For leading the Cleveland Cavaliers to their first championship, Sports Illustrated named blank their sportsman of the year.

BURBANK: LeBron James

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: In Japan, a man failed to get hired for an open position...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...After he was caught blanking during the interview.

(LAUGHTER)

BURBANK: It's one of those things where saying blanking makes it sound extremely dirty.

SAGAL: Yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

BURBANK: He was looking for a different job.

SAGAL: No. During the interview for the position, he stole the company's president's wallet.

(LAUGHTER)

BURBANK: Was the job pickpocket that he was applying for?

SAGAL: No. According to the president of the company, his wallet went missing during the interview. And since there were only two people in the room...

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: ...He pretty much figured out it had to be the job applicant. The president admitted that he probably should have anticipated this, especially after he asked the applicant what his biggest weakness was and the guy said, well, probably I just work too hard. Oh, and I also steal.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Luke do on our quiz?

KURTIS: His six right gave him 12 more points - total of 15. And he moves into the lead.

SAGAL: All right. Well, then.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: How many, then, does Adam Felber need to win?

KURTIS: Six to win, Adam.

FELBER: Yikes.

SAGAL: All right, Adam. This is for the game. Fill in the blank.

FELBER: Yeah, sure is.

SAGAL: Claiming 134 votes, blank was re-elected as House Democratic leader on Wednesday.

FELBER: Nancy Pelosi.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, 2,000 veterans headed to the Standing Rock Sioux Reservation to protect protestors of the blank.

FELBER: Pipeline.

SAGAL: Right. The Dakota...

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: ...Access Pipeline. For the first time in eight years, blank agreed to cut their oil production by almost 10 percent.

FELBER: OPEC.

SAGAL: Right. This week...

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: ...French President blank said he wouldn't seek re-election.

FELBER: What's his face.

(LAUGHTER)

FELBER: Hollande.

SAGAL: Yes, Hollande.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A woman in Oregon was forced to call the police this week after a man outside her house would not stop blanking.

FELBER: He was whistling.

SAGAL: Yes.

FELBER: And he was whistling a tune.

SAGAL: Yes. He would not stop.

FELBER: "Closing Time..."

SAGAL: That's it.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: He would not stop...

FELBER: ...By Semisonic, written by Dan Wilson.

SAGAL: Semisonic's "Closing Time."

HONG: Wow.

SAGAL: So she called the police. On Thursday, researchers suggested that blank could be used to treat anxiety and depression in cancer patients.

FELBER: Ecstasy.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Actually, hallucinogenic mushrooms, but I'll give it to you. This week, it was reported that hip hop superstar blank was released from the hospital.

FELBER: Kanye West.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Police in Massachusetts say a woman may have been intoxicated...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...When she tried to use blank as her ID at a local bar.

FELBER: A swing set.

SAGAL: No...

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: ...although that would be great. I drove here from Australia. I'd like a drink.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: No, she tried to use a slice of pizza as her ID.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: According to the police, she walked...

FELBER: At a certain point in my life, that would have been an accurate ID.

SAGAL: I know.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: She walked into a pizza place, walked across the street. They asked for ID at the bar. She showed them a slice of pizza. The bouncer denied her entry into the bar, mainly because she was a brunette, but her ID picture indicated she was a wedge of cooked dough covered in tomato sauce, cheese and pepperoni.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, did Adam do well enough to win?

KURTIS: 14 more points, total of 18 and the winner.

SAGAL: Hey.

HONG: Wow.

(APPLAUSE) Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.